Necklace

Im still feeling guilty today and I buy Connie a necklace.

Duffer comes around with his little girl and while they are having dinner and playing we nip out and walk the dog. I tell him all about the L row, he makes the point of why is Connie reading my messages, a point remaining unanswered.

He tells me that their was scratchings in his loft last night and after much persuasion from his burd JA, he finally agrees to stick his head throught the loft. JA has convinced herself their is a rat manifestation up there. Duffer and I kill ourself laughing at this, what rats are magically appearing...... We decide on a wind up.

Being a good dad requires a sense of humour or youll just die at the first hurdle and I have been putting into practice for as long as possible.

We phone JA up while walking the dog and try hard to keep a straight face... Outer Hebridean accent.....

"Hello, is that Ms Black ?, "
"Yes"

"Hello Ms Black, this is Mr Mchperson from the Outer Hebridean to Lothians, Environmental Health and Safety, Rat Manifestation Department"

"Shut up, I know its you A"

"I dont know what you mean Ms Black, Im calling about your rat manifestation problem"

"Never mind about the rats, I have to go im cooking my dinner"

"What do mean Ms Black, you have to go before the rats start eating your dinner, did you say"

"Tell me Ms Black, when would be suitable to come around and kill the little buggers, and how would you like me to be killing them, I have a big gun I could bring"

Its goes on for about 10 minutes, we ask her if the rats are the size or dogs, and whether they have been nesting in her knicker drawer and whether they are manifesting themselves regularly.

JA, knows all along its us, but we dont crack and keep up with the accent. Duffer and I laugh the rest of the way home like schoolboys.

Its not as good as the time we convinced Joe he had bird flu though, now that was classic.